Batten Down the Hatches
In my last post, I mentioned having purchased a shirt that says, “Stronger than the Storm.” The day after writing it, I wore that shirt and felt like a big fat liar. Sometimes, we feel anything but strong. That day, I was feeling worn out, discouraged, and scared about where things are heading.
The phrase, “Batten down the hatches” came to mind. I knew it was an old nautical expression that referred to preparing for a storm, but I was curious about the specifics. The Cambridge Dictionary online offered two definitions. First, “to fasten the entrances to the lower part of a ship using wooden boards.” The lower part of the ship was where the crew would go to rest. It was the space where they were protected from the wind and the waves. Being in that space didn’t change the storm itself. It did, however, allow a break from fighting it. Battening down the hatches protected that space.
This got me thinking. A physical space where we can have a respite from life’s storms is important too. Ideally, that space would be within our own homes. Sometimes, however, that is precisely where the storm resides. That’s the case for me. With my daughter’s medical challenges, I’m never truly off duty unless I leave the house. So, my place of respite needs to be elsewhere.
During the summer, I feel the most relaxed when I’m near water. Fortunately, our town is on the St. Croix River. I can sit at a park and overlook it or go to another park and walk along it. The deck of my favorite restaurant even has a great view of it. So, for me, battening down the hatches would be prioritizing the time to experience one of those three things on a regular basis.
The Cambridge dictionary’s secondary, and perhaps more modern definition is, “to prepare for a difficult situation.” Collins Dictionary explains it in this way, “If someone battens down the hatches, they prepare themselves so that they will be able to survive a coming difficulty or crisis.”
This is the challenge. Oftentimes, by the time we realize that we’re facing a difficulty or crisis, we’re already in it. It’s important to continue to be hopeful, but when it becomes clear that the storm that we’re in is going to last a while, it’s also important to pause and evaluate how we’re going to get through it. In addition to protecting a physical space (or, as in my case, the time to visit one), we also need to protect ourselves. In my opinion, one of the most important aspects to safeguard is our energy.
Our energy is limited. We need to be careful in whom/what we invest the little we have left to give. For me, that looks like turning down invitations to anything that doesn’t re-energize me. That qualification can be determined by the activity itself or even the person/people that accompany it. I feel selfish even saying that, but we are in a major storm season. Sometimes the waves hit with very little warning and I’ve learned that my ability to advocate well is greatly affected by how I’ve spent the days preceding each hospital admission. When I’ve spent time with people that fill me up or when I have been purposeful about prioritizing self-care, I feel strong and confident in following my “mom intuition.” On the flip side, if I walk into the ER already worn out, emotionally or physically, I am less likely to stand firm and inevitably regret not doing so.
Battening Down the Hatches may look entirely different for you, but hopefully this has at least sparked some ideas. If nothing else, remember that you are not alone.